angel of griefGrief is a messy business.  We want it to be manageable and to progress in an orderly manner, but it isn’t like that.  Grief comes uninvited, stays longer than it seems it should, throws our life and being-ness out of whack, makes us feel “not quite ourselves” for a very long time, and won’t leave us alone.  We want it to be otherwise, to be something we can control, understand, and predict.  But grief has its own way.

And a good grief is free to follow its own way.  Because when we lose someone close to us, we haven’t just lost the person we talked to about this, or went with to that, we have lost a spiritual companion.  And while we talk about “wrapping our brain around” what has happened, what we really struggle with is wrapping our soul around it.

I could write a hundred blog posts about grief, and I may do that very thing over time, but today I have one small piece of the grief process on my mind.  When someone close to us dies, grief strikes so hard that there is physical pain from the loss.  We feel this most strongly in the gut, which is our chakra center for relationships, and the pain there can be excruciating.  This we know about and are comfortable talking about.  But there is another phenomenon that manifests during this stage of deep, intense grief, that we aren’t as comfortable talking about.  And this has to do with vibrational frequencies and psychic phenomenon.

I wrote about vibrational frequencies and psychic ability in an earlier post (see The Dog Whistle Principle), but I need to say more now.  This earliest stage of grief, when we feel the loss most intensely, changes us.  And the change is not just metaphysical — who am I now that they are gone from my life? — it is physical as well.  We are “not ourselves” to such an extent during this time that our vibrational frequency is changed, and this change brings our frequencies more in line with the spirits of the dead, and makes us temporarily psychic.  It is weird, but also beautiful and wonderful, because it allows people the opportunity to have direct contact with the spirits of their deceased loved ones immediately following their death, when this is most needed and wanted, as people struggle to wrap their soul around what has happened.  A lot of people dismiss and discount this, but I wish they wouldn’t, because it is real, it is helpful, and it doesn’t last.

After my grandmother died, my grandfather insisted that she was there in the nursing home with him, standing at the foot of his bed, talking to him.  Reality was a little foggy around the edges for him, but he was clear about this, that she was dead and she was there.  This made my mother very uncomfortable and she wanted him to stop talking about it.  I, on the other hand, wanted him to go on, as I was happy to hear that this was happening and that he wasn’t dismissing it as a hallucination or a wishful thinking.  It was a sign to me that their spiritual connection was strong, and that they were taking the opportunity presented to reach across the divide.  In my grandfather’s case, I think these conversations with my grandmother’s spirit helped him wrap his soul around the loss of her, and helped him prepare for his own passing a year later.

I am of the opinion that, following a profound loss, a good grief includes taking advantage of this brief opportunity for direct contact.  But for a lot of people, swearing that they’ve seen a passing glimpse of a deceased loved one, or heard that loved ones’ voice in answer to a question, is disconcerting.  People think they’ve gone crazy — I must admit that I thought the same thing of myself the first time I saw a dead person.  But it isn’t crazy.  It’s a very natural thing that happens.  And it isn’t a hallucination or wishful thinking.  It is real and it is good and it is temporary — your vibrational frequencies will go back to normal soon enough and the door to that kind of direct contact will close.  But if this door opens for you or someone you know, please go through it.  Take advantage of the opportunity for spirit-to-spirit communication while it lasts.  Ask questions.  Say your good-byes.  Reach across the divide.  You will be glad you did.

And if you missed your chance, or the chance never came, I am always here.  As a Psychic Medium, my vibrational frequencies are permanently in the state that enables me to cross the divide for you, and make communication with your departed loved ones possible.

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